This week in pictures: copulation, trannies, and post-election fever

Picture this: 52 hours, 650 square feet, 2 grilled cheese sandwiches, 2 salads, 1 bag of popcorn, 2 bananas, 1 bowl of mini wheat’s, a box of hair dye, an “E! True Hollywood Story” on Dawson’s Creek, and season 3 of How I met Your Mother. This my friends, is how I spent my Friday and Saturday.

It appears more reclusive and painstakingly boring than it actually was. Yes, I may have stained my bathroom door with dye, and gained a few pounds, but I laughed and cried, and learned that “Josh is really a lot like Pacey.” Thanks, E! True Hollywood Story, thanks.

So it’s time for me to clear out my pictures folder at work!














This is Britain’s oldest virgin! She just turned 105, and has never been laid! She's adorable, but her facial expression just screams, “I cast judgement unto you, YOU FORNICATORS!” Well, I’m sure it would be a little less harrowing than that, but you never know, some elderly woman can be real pistols!

And on a completely related note: apparently there was a sex shop down in the States that was giving away free vibrators to anyone that voted.
















Not only is Obama making history, unleashing hope on millions, and changing lives, but his victory means that these two twats LOST! I’m so glad we’ll never have to see “speidi” walking around LA with a riffle, a six-pack, and their hideous attempt at political campaigning.

Here’s a close up of their shits, whoops, I mean shirts:















Seriously, faking photo ops is sooo last year.

















I was watching Anderson Cooper the other night…like I do a lot of nights, dreaming of his luscious silver locks and crystal blue eyes…right, uhh, so… I got to thinking about aging. Why is it that when women age they just get furrowed, loose, and unattractive, but as men age, they become “distinguished” and “sophisticated”? You know what, fuck that! Damn those silver foxes and their ability to still get all the women they want (and in Cooper’s case, men). It makes me sick! In fact, it makes me so sick I want to make sweet passionate love to him to cure myself.













Oregon: electing hot Tranny Mayor's since 2008.

I’ve always had a thing for Oregon; I’ve never actually been there, but I perceive it to be a place where everyone drinks like alcoholics on Intervention, and calls all-dressed chips “Canadian.” I’m not sure if it’s because they’re raging drunks, or just really awesome people, but a city in Oregon just elected America’s first Tranny Mayor. His/her name is Stu, and he was a dude for his first stint as mayor, but this time around, he decided to run as a lady, new breasts and all! And he...i mean, she, won by a landslide! It’s weird that a small city in Oregon will elect a tranny, but California, a supposedly progressive state, banned gay marriage.














If you haven't, go see Zack and Miri Make a Porno...or don't, and just go read the review I wrote about it.